Selah March

January 12, 2006

Behold the Whiny Loser

Filed under: blah blah blah — Selah March @ 5:32 pm
Tags:

I’m cold, I’m hot, I’m sweaty, and everything seems sort of out-of-focus, even when I remember to wear my glasses.

If you squozed me, bad oozy green stuff would shoot out every hole in my head.

And tick…tick…tick…the sound of a deadline approaching. Only three days away now — the Amber Heat Wave Contest, which I’m determined to enter, even if my entry itself turns out to be incoherent, TheraFlu-overdose induced drivel.

At any moment, I expect my husband to threaten to hide my VICKS™ Sinex™ 12 Hour Nasal Spray if I don’t stop hitting it like a crack pipe. Ha. Let him. Like any good addict, I keep a stash.

I’m looking forward to the moment when I hit “send” on this puppy and can indulge in a shot of the good stuff. That’s right, you heard me: Original formula NyQuil™, complete with full alcohol content. The stuff of legend. Got a bottle with an unbroken seal in the back of the linen closet, just waitin’ on me. Yeah, it’s so far past its expiration date that it’s probably toxic in full-dose form, but I’m not afraid.

Though I do wonder how much I could get for it on eBay…

2 Comments »

  1. LOL. I’m sorry you feel so sick, but I can’t wait to see what comes out of your semi-delirious mind!

    Comment by Karen — January 13, 2006 @ 8:42 am | Reply

  2. Thanks, Karen.

    Feeling better today. Surprisingly, the couple thousand words I wrote last night aren’t the surreal nightmare I expected. Missing a few verbs here and there, and I went nuts on the adjverbs in the last couple paragraphs, but I’ve been known to do that when virus-free and stone sober.

    Comment by Selah March — January 13, 2006 @ 1:06 pm | Reply


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