Selah March

Seven Year Ache

Contemporary Western homoerotic (M/M) romance; long novella

Available in electronic format only

Available for Kindle

Amber Allure/Amber Quill Press

ISBN-13: 978-1-60272-153-1

WARNING: This novella contains girl cooties in the form of one m/m/f scene

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Rafe McCaffrey, washed-up country music one-hit wonder, is coming home to northwestern Montana and the only man he’s ever loved — his best friend Jamie Crosby. But the years they’ve spent apart have been kind to neither man. Jamie, owner of the Lazy C guest ranch, has turned hard and bitter, just like his father before him. He can’t forgive Rafe for leaving him when he needed his friend the most. Hiring Rafe to work the ranch can only end in trouble…so why does Jamie do it?

Ranch cook Lilah Montclaire wants nothing more than to forget the mistakes in her past and make a fresh start somewhere else, far away from the Montana valley where she was born and raised. But she’s grown attached to the Lazy C and its owner, and doesn’t know how to leave them. And this new guy, Rafe McCaffrey? He’s got charm and looks to spare. She sees how Jamie and Rafe look at each other, and wishes she could share in the heat between them.

Can Jamie forgive Rafe? Can Rafe forgive himself? Can they give Lilah what she needs to heal her broken spirit and find a way to soothe their own seven year ache?



“Sit,” Jamie said and took a seat himself on the sofa across from the doors. Bo and Patch settled on their bed in the far corner of the room, next to the dark, cold fireplace.

Rafe chose the armchair on the other side of the big maple coffee table and concentrated all his attention on the condensation forming on the bottle in his hand.

“Rafe, look at me.”

He glanced up and straight into that bright stare. “Jamie–“

“No. You listen now. You shut up and listen.” His words were short, his voice low and urgent. “I spent the past seven years tryin’ to figure out what the hell I did wrong. How I managed to fuck it all up and drive you away.”


“I’m talkin’ now, goddamn it.” Louder, sharper. Like he didn’t care who heard. “At first I reckoned I’d get over it. Figured guys missed their best friends when they grew up and moved away.”

“Look, Jamie, I’m–“

“I swear to fuck, Rafe, if you don’t shut the hell up…”

Rafe nodded. “All right. Finish. But then it’s my turn.”

Jamie’s eyes narrowed, but he returned Rafe’s nod. “Here’s the thing…about Roseanna? She was sweet, and we might’ve made a go of it, but she wasn’t you. Seein’ her mouth wrapped ’round my dick — no matter how good it felt — didn’t make me miss watchin’ yours suckin’ on a sourball any less.” He paused to clear his throat, like the next part was somehow even harder to spit out. “Seven years, Rafe. Wishin’ you were here to see what I made of the ranch. Wishin’ you were here to ask ‘What should I do?’ about this or that. And jerkin’ off in the shower thinkin’ about you.”

Any sound Rafe might’ve made died on its way up out of his throat. All of a sudden the room felt small and close and stuffy, like it hadn’t ten seconds before. And Jamie, sitting there, looking at him. Waiting on him. Waiting on his answer.

After a good thirty seconds, he set his beer on the floor next to the chair and said, “That’s fine, Jamie, but that’s just sex. And I’m not willing to trade it for…” Rafe sighed, ran a damp hand over his face and started again. “I’ve had a lot of sex, Jamie. It’s good, but not worth losing a friend over.”

He watched Jamie lean forward and rest his elbows on his knees. Rafe remembered Pop sitting just the same way when he had a point to make. “That’s why you walked out on me after what happened behind the Hotspot? Christ, Rafe, you’re an idiot.”

“Yeah, maybe. But I figured you were gonna hate me either way, and it was better you hated me for leaving than for staying.” There it was, laying him bare. All his fear, and how certain he’d been that once Jamie realized what they’d done — what Rafe had let them do — he’d turn away from him, disgusted.

“I don’t hate you, and I never would.”

“You say that now.”

“I’d have said it then, but you didn’t gimme a goddamn chance.” Loud again, and frustrated, and if he didn’t shut up they’d have Cindy down here asking what was wrong. He took a raspy breath Rafe could hear from ten feet away and said, “What about now?”

Rafe shrugged. “What about it? Things are pretty good. Like I said, I don’t toss away what I’ve got, unless I hear a better offer.”

Jamie slammed his bottle down on the coffee table and got up on his feet. “I’ve been offering. In the barn yesterday–“

“That’s your dick. I can get that elsewhere.”

“Yeah. I noticed.” Four long strides and he ended up right in front of Rafe, glaring down at him with hot eyes.

“What the fuck does that even mean, Jamie?”

“You and Kris Killborn. Saw you two talkin’ between sets. Saw how he looked at you. You gonna tell me you didn’t see?”

Sweet baby Jesus, the man was crazy. “What difference does it make? I’m not in town with him. I came home.” Rafe pulled himself to his feet and met Jamie’s hard stare face-to-face.

“It makes a difference, Rafe. A big, fucking difference.”

Shit. He’s jealous.

JT Crosby — well-liked, successful owner of the Lazy C and all-around respected member of their little corner of heaven — was jealous over Rafe McCaffrey, the charity case his Pop had taken on as cheap labor. It shouldn’t have brought back that tight, full feeling in his chest, or made him want to smile so big his face was likely to break off and drop on the floor. But it did.

“You think that’s funny? You son-of-a–” Jamie grabbed his shoulder in one huge hand and wrapped the other around the back of Rafe’s neck. When he spoke again, he used sharp, hard little kisses on Rafe’s mouth as periods between sharp, hard little words. “You. Belong. To me.”


“Shut up and let me fuck you, Rafe, before I lose my ever-lovin’ mind.”


  • 4.5 Blue Ribbons from ROMANCE JUNKIES: “What an unexpected treasure Selah March’s Seven Year Ache turned out to be. This story is chock full of emotional situations, a little bit of suspense and loveable characters. Rafe and Jamie’s friendship is definitely strained after so much time apart, but when they would have thrown it all away, the women in their lives, Lilah and Aunt Cindy, manage to get them to see the situation from a different angle. This is a wonderful, heart-warming story that will alternately bring tears to your eyes and then a smile to your face.” (Chrissy Dionne)

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